Irony
by minuu-chan
Summary: "Kudo Shinichi…." He growled. The man drew a gun from his black attire and aimed at the boy's head.


It was three o'clock as Conan entered his house. The boy threw his school bag to the side and peeled off his jacket. The blinking light on his answering machine caught his eyes, which only brought on a questioning look.

Although his social life had been screwed over since he joined the league of the vertically challenged, he did maintain a passable substance of a social life that consisted of a wonderful trail mix of elementary school brats and the egotistical police department.

The detective walked toward the phone, and to his surprise it read '8 missed calls'. This was an unusual thing since no one really called him on his house phone, given his situation. He pressed the red blinking button.

" You have 8 new voice messages" a robotic, womanly voice stated " voice message 1…"

The phone went dead silent for a moment.

"Hey Shinichi, its me, Ran. I just called to say hi, but…" there was a pause "…but I guess you not here. So solving a big case still? Well good luck and be careful ok? Bye."

The phone beeped.

Conan almost sank to the floor, as the message ended. It was too heart wrenching for him to hear, for a dull, aching pain slowly bloomed within his chest, eating away at his confined heart. What was it called again? Oh yes, guilt.

He was suddenly snapped out of his emotional self-destruct by the answering machine." Voice message 2" It stated

A very soft but eerie tune rang from the phone. "_Oh I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts! A didily-dee! They are all standing in a roe-oh-oh-"_

"-Message deleted" his finger was pressing the delete button as he stared at his machine as if it grew arms.

"Message 3…" it continued.

" I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVEEEEEE!" the phone screeched, making him slightly jump. "I'LL—…wait…oh shit. Wrong number—CLICK"

Conan slowly hovered his thumb over the delete button with a disquieting look, then finally pressed the button after he convinced himself the person was not a murder that he would encounter in the future.

"Voice message 4"

An obnoxious voice suddenly blared from the machine."HEY!" then the message ended

The boy looked at the phone. He silently pondering on the idea that the caller made a mistake of ending the call before recording a message, seeing how the message itself was too…short.

"Voice message 5"

"ITS ME!" the message ended

"Voice message 6"

"HEIJI!" it ended again.

"Voice message 7"

"WAZ UP!?" it screeched.

The detective felt his grip on the phone tighten. He didn't know whether to feel absolutely irritated out of his mind of his fellow detective, or feel utterly devastated from the fact that a detective of his caliber would resort to such methods to leave a simple message that could have been done in one.

Suddenly he heard a loud splintering of wood. He whipped his head towards the front door just in time to see it burst open, followed by a tall, dark cladded man stepping in. "Kudo Shinichi…." The man growled.

The mysterious man drew a gun from his black attire, and then aimed at the boy's head.

"_Oh shit….they found me…ohshitohshitoshit…."_ The young detective thought as the color from his face drained.

"W-What? Im not Shinichi-nii" Conan squeaked in his best childish voice.

The man lowered his face to the boys level. "Really? Then what are you doing in here...boy " he practically hissed.

" Uh…Im his cousin….and—"

"Don't kid your self Kudo, we know it's you." the man smirked, which made his 'In deep shit-O-meter' needle bounce erratically.

"Proof! You don't have proof!" the detective stammered out. He had to keep his cool like always, and if he played his cards right, he may even get out there alive. Since they didn't really have any proof it was actually him, he was safe—

Suddenly the answering machine went off.

" Message 8"

"HEY WHATS UP KUDO!" a very familiar voice sang. " ITS ME KAITO!"

"I know its been hard ever since you shrunk from that weird ass pill the B.O gave ya, and how you've been trying to lay low and stuff. I just wanted say that im here for you dude! Your secret is safe with me! See ya Shinichi!"

"No more new messages" the answering machine simply stated, and then went silent.

…

Conan heard the gun clicked.

He slowly looked up and found him self staring into the gun barrel.

"You've got to be kidding me…."


End file.
